If you start paying too much attention to people, if you dive one layer beyond what they say into what kinds of possible thoughts might lead then into saying it, you’ll at some point begin to notice, or maybe feel in your gut, the moment they find a category for you, the time they mentally put you in a box.
That would be ok, except the very fact that you can do it means or requires that you have a kind of empathy that makes you wish for the other person to have healthy thoughts, and awkwardly fitting categories for things are not healthy, which means you’ll try to hint people into unboxing you, which in turn means they’ll get closer and closer to dumping you into their can’t-figure-that-out basket, a basket adorned with a big red F.E.A.R. flag. Thus they hate you. All of that being so automatic they wouldn’t even get to know it. They hate you because you get them too well, which means they can’t get you at all except if they give up on it and allow you to basically drive them around. The unwritten contract is something like either you brain-wash me or i’ll dislike you. Which is a recipe for fail. Which means relationships base don mutual understanding are somewhat science-fiction-y. Which is such an optimistic thought, n’est ce pàs?
Posted by Wordmobi