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We won.

We avoided all the traps, even this most insidious, of not falling into traps.

Even more important: we have made our dreams worthy of our world and our world worthy of our dreams.

And what i mean is: i am perfectly happy with who i am. I am not pursuing some impossible goal or building a life based on some taken-for-granted ideal or trying to recreate an image of family with which i was not even happy on the first place — as most people seem to imply any sane one should. I do not accept such notions as “i have dated everyone i ever was interested in” or “i had everything i wanted”, with their obvious denying of the important part of life that is loss.

And finally i have not ever dwelt on the illusion of individualism, which means: i do see that (and how) my path is the path of the whole human being — in more than one way.

The traps have been many, and the path that still lies ahead of us is even more daunting. But we don’t — and we didn’t — give up on liberty. Be it a boyfriend that jealously want to put us in a box, be it the material things that we own and that end up owning us, be it ideologies that only set you free if you refuse to see anything besides them, be it our fear that makes a cage seem so appealing. We refused all of them and moved on.

And we have also known for ever that perfection is another name for refusing to listen to the other. So, we never laid out intricate plans that encase and freeze life inside, instead we just refused to not be completely happy every single moment — not exilariated, not comfortable, not hedonistic — but true to ourselves.

And we never searched for the simple answer, as if life was a school test, instead being always open and always looking to the horizon. And we never forgot that dreaming is also a form of violence, instead we accepted the burden of making people cry and bleed when it was needed. And we never hid our own tears, instead we remained as faithful to our pain as we were to our joy.

And we know that the whole wide world laughs at us, and disdains our hopes, and say that it’s all too difficult. And we know that, in more than one way, they are right. But there is a secret we keep zealously, and it warms us in the cold nights and makes us cool in the heat of the fight. And this secret, it is simply that a dream is stronger than anything else. And our dream, so delicate, so thin, it is strongbeautiful in our minds. And it has grown: even now it becomes more wonderful. We are more free now than a year ago, we are more open now than a week ago, we see deeper and farther now than ever before.

Don’t get me wrong. I know there is a lot to do still. And i remember that i have not even begun to sketch up ideas about the next steps. But what must be done is not some buffoon-styled overcomplex kingdom or rule or state or revolution — we only have to rethink the world.

Simple, neh?

And if we have long, arduous, painful work to do, it is not beginning from nothing — it’s beginning from us, from our being, from everything that we are — which is the brightest light of the whole infinite universe.

No one else can see it, yet. We are alone in our understanding. We are alone in our dreams. But we dreamt the dream. We made it shine in the midst of the darkness. We gave birth to strongbeauty.

We see an universe that is so big, so devoid of an end — and we are the most precious thing that ever existed.

And we won.

2 Comments

  1. Why should we re-think the world if “we won”, if you are happy as you are, and if I am happy with myself? What is the problem of the world?

    Yes, it is great to be the most precious thing that ever existed. But it seems that it isn’t enough, isn’t it?

  2. Cuducos, véi, “if you ask this question you deny your own chicken nature”, ou em outras palavras você precisa urgentemente se desintoxicar dessa ideologia boba — no sentido de que me dá preguiça até de falar nela — essa ideologia boba de que o mercado constrói nossas vidas, que as pessoas trabalham porque elas têm “desejos”, de que a justificativa da vida é o prazer que você sente. Você está tão embrenhado nesse monte de baboseira que não consegue nem ver como isso tudo não faz sentido algum. Não que a ideologia esteja errada — eu acho até que ela deve estar “certa”, em qualquer sentido útil academicamente — mas simplesmente que continuar perpetuando essas idéias é como correr em círculos. Por exemplo, eu posso ficar latindo que “2+2=4” é VERDADE (sem brincadeira, o Daniel Paz me fez gastar UM MÊS inteirinho discutindo essa bobagem, depois te conto os detalhes se é que já não contei algum dia desses). Eu posso gastar meses discutindo isso e não avançar um milimetro na minha compreensão da filosofia da ciência e da epistemologia. Ou mesmo sem nunca aprender derivada. Em ainda outras palavras, o mercado pode ser a “resposta certa”, mas é uma pergunta não muito interessante, e uma boa pergunta vale muito mais que um caminhão de boas respostas. Em qualquer mercado em que você tente vendê-la. Uma boa pergunta não é fungível, e portanto ela escapa à análise de mercado, sempre, e por definição. Sacou? Por isso que “estar satisfeito com você mesmo” não te impede de querer mudar as coisas e de traçar caminhos diferentes. É exatamente o contrário, sem estar satisfeito consigo mesmo, você só pode fazer oposição, você não consegue fazer diferença. Sem estar satisfeito consigo mesmo você consegue ser o que o PT era antes da eleição do Lula: o cara que tá sempre reclamando mas cujas reclamações só reforçam a ideologia consensual massificada. Pra sair desse círculo, você precisa VER o círculo, você precisa entender um contexto maior, mais amplo, mais tridimensional, mais abstrato. Você precisa aumentar o seu alcance ontológico, sacou? Por isso que eu fico te sacaneando quando você posta esses blá-blá-blás recauchutados de opinião moralista sobre a política brasileira: porque cada um desses comentários te leva um pouco mais longe de compreender os fatos que você tá criticando em um contexto mais profundo. Então, entenda: é suficiente.


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