I know it sounds common sense. If you are causing yourself trouble, you should at least not bitch about it to the people around you. This would qualify as a required minimum of respect.
Nevertheless, it does not work that way. Everybody is always complaining about things that they cause themselves.
Let’s take for example relationships. Most people are miserable because they have unrealistic demands about their own feelings. Girls want a guy who is respectful and nice, but they want to be asked out. In other words, they want a guy who respects their limits (in being nice), but that does not respect their limits (in asking what they want him to ask but will not offer). Seen from the outside, it seems like they want to be frustrated.
And it’s not just girls either. Guys, old people, young people, religious ones, etc, etc.
My dad, for sure, is a poster child for complaining about what he does to himself. He is diabetic and eats sugar, and every f*ing day has something depressing to say about how miserable it is to be old. His indisciplined diet compromised his retinas, and everyday he states that he is utterly helpless and incapable because of it, just like it had fallen from the sky, like he didn’t know what caused it, like he couldn’t spot the guilty party. His doctor says “Your view will not get much better” and he pretends to not understand that, and submits himself to myriads of treatments, just to be frustrated about the meek results. He shouts at people and mistreats everyone, and them gets all boo-hoo about how no one visits him anymore.
Do you want to do something that will clearly result in shit? Suit yourself. Do you want to shoot your own foot? Knock yourself out. But you wanna do all that AND use MY ears to complain?
There should be a law against it…